The Indian Election Circus

ACT 1, Scene 1

(Raj Narayan Nivas, Bharatpur, Rajasthan, India, 2030hrs)

(Shri Raj Narayan Sharma is enjoying his dinner and flipping channels on the television when something catches his attention.)

BBC World Service — Breaking News: Nearly 11 months before the completion of its term, India’s ruling right-wing alliance has decided to call General Elections.

(He changes the channel.)

AL-Jazeera (Panel discussion): It appears that the ageing prime minister has been swayed by his counsellors; who seem to have convinced him of his infallibility, huge popularity and the feel-good factor prevalent in the country. They have been harping on the ‘Indian Shinning’ theme for some weeks now to try and influence the voters.

(He again changes the channel.)

RT — India Expert: With opposition routed in the previous round of elections to the four-state assemblies, it has been considered the best possible time to go in for Parliamentary polls and ensure the continuity of the ruling alliance for the next 5 years.

Ramdeen (domestic help): Sahab, daal aur lijeye, (puts more lentils in the bowl in his plate and adds pure ghee to it)

(He changes to Y News.)

Y News: …and here are the state-wise details:

State: Delhi

Population: 2 Crores approx.

Parliamentary seats: 07

Main parties: Indian National Congress (INC), Bhartiya Janta Party, AAP, Janta Dal (United), Akali Dal, Bhajun Samaj Party

Scene 2

(Two Bookies talking on the phone, Delhi 1230 hrs)

Junior Bookie: Satta bazaar kya kehta hai? (What does the betting market say?)

Bookie-Master: In Delhi, it is 3–4–0, for Saffron party, Secular party and Common man party.

Junior Bookie: But Boss, the secular party is yet to declare its candidates, unlike the others.

Bookie-Master: But the trend will remain the same. East Delhi is the strongest seat for the secular party. After VHP pracharka took it away from H.K.L. Bhagat for 2 consecutive terms, here is the chance for the secular party to take it back.

Junior Bookie: It seems the secular party has been caught unawares by the ruling party’s decision. Let’s see if it can rise to the challenge.

Bookie-Master: The delay is understandable. Like every election, there is hectic lobbying and scramble for the tickets of not just secular party but all major political parties.

Junior Bookie: I have heard that such is the pressure put on by the ticket-aspirants that many senior leaders had to go into hiding, or at the very least have switched off their mobiles until the final list is out.

Scene 3

(News-room discussion, major news channel, Noida, 1622 hrs)

Budhir Chowdhary, Editor in Chief and Anchor (Prime-time TV News): As Delhi is the capital city; we can see that all the 07 seats here have a long list of politically heavy-weight candidates with their advocates in the top leadership.

Female journalist Smita: The ruling saffron party has announced its candidates early in the game. But the secular party has been unable to come up with its list because of serious infighting.

News-room journalist Jaya: And Sir, as usual, in the end, the state leadership passed a unanimous resolution to give the high-command or supreme leader the task of picking up the candidates.

Editor (looking at his mobile): And this just in…the matriarch of the parivaar or the first family has made her choice and now it has been announced — only 3 days before the last date for filing of nominations.

News-room journalist Jaya: There will be a lot of heartburn among those who have been denied the party ticket.

Newspaper report

In the heat of the election generated mania and under pressure from their supporters, many leaders announced their plans to stand as independent against their party’s official candidate. While the more enterprising switched loyalty overnight and filed papers as the nominee of parties with no base of their own in the capital.

Scene 4

(Two bookies talking on the phone, Delhi 2122 hrs)

Junior Bookie: Guru, (Boss) have you checked the list of the candidates picked up by the high-command?

Bookie-Master: I think you are surprised by Sharma jee’s selection.

Junior Bookie: Not just me, everyone — all the leaders, analysts, media and the people are surprised by this candidate selected for East Delhi.

Bookie-Master: I know; even the old hands of the secular party are baffled by the selection and confessed ignorance as regards the candidate.

Junior Bookie: Boss, this retired Director General of C.R.P.F., Shri Raj Narayan Sharma has no connection with East Delhi whatsoever. His name was not even in the fray.

Bookie-Master: Anadar kee baat hain chotte, (Grapevine has it) that this retired D.G. was in charge of the battalion at the PM residence when the late mother-in-law of madamjee (the current national president of the party) ruled the country.

Junior Bookie: Jey baat! So this retired cop is being rewarded for his loyalty to the first family.

Bookie-Master: Maybe, also the serious infighting and leg-pulling between the various home-grown candidates of the constituency as also the powerful and resurgent Brahmin lobby is to be blamed for the imposing of an outsider.

Will the reluctant politician be able to win the election or will he end up as a proverbial joker? Find out here: https://amzn.to/2TcRBPf